So, today I am getting ready for another 2 week trip away with work. I went to bed last night and felt rotten. I ended up falling asleep infront of an open window in my lounge, waking up at 4am when I dragged my sorry arse back to bed.

Today I still feel awful.

The only thing is, I don't think I'm actually ill. I think it's nerves. I go into a rather large job on my own tomorrow with no supervision (what were they thinking) except a director who is looking to take me down. I honestly think that's what is making me feel like this.

At least I hope so. Cannot afford to get ill now!

I need to learn how to calm down. How to not let things get to me. Who cares if my P45 comes in the post! Arghhhhhhhhh!

I feel like crying today which is very unlike me. Feel like doing a runner and starting another new life!

I'm sure that in two weeks time once I've got this first one done I'll be ok. That is, of course, if I still have a job.

Let's wait and see!